2007年10月5日 星期五
10/5
I was very angry this evening. The bus from Kaohsiung to Liugui delayed about one and half hour. I waited the bus in Qishan and also lined up about one hour. My left lag was uncomfortable, so I needed to use my right leg to support my whole body. I deeply believed that my right leg’s muscles became very strong by lining up. Many people were lining up in front of me, too. After one and half hour, the bus came finally. I got on the bus, but I could stand next to the door only. Everyone was squished on the big bus. The most unfortunate thing was that I stood from Qishan to Liugui for fifty-four minutes.
訂閱：
張貼留言 (Atom)
1 則留言:
In the second sentence, you should say "was delayed (for) about". In the third, you must say "I waited for the bus....had to stand on line for about".
"My left lag was" ==> "My left leg was". An inexcusable typographical error, I'm afraid. Proofread your work.
"I deeply believed that my right leg’s muscles became very strong by lining up." ==> This is Chinese English, a direct translation. It's not natural English. Expressing a "seep belief" about such a mundane thing sounds silly in English even though it's perfectly normal Chinese and Japanese (I know the Chinese character used to express this idea, but it shouldn't be translated as "deep" in this case). You should say something on the order of: "I felt as if my right leg got much stronger after holding me up for that hour".
"After one and half hour," ==> "After one and half hours,".
"the bus came finally." ==> "the bus finally came." If it is possible, put the modifier immediately in front of the word it modifies. It's often okay to put it immediately after that word, but in this case it sounds a little funny to my native-speaker ear. The next sentence has a similar problem.
"but I could stand next to the door only." ==> "but I could stand only next to the door."
"that I stood...for fifty-four minutes." This would be better as "that I had to stand...for fifty-four minutes."
Your post is very clear and easy to understand.
張貼留言